If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
