Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
