just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
