Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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