their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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