i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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