so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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