gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
