he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Randomize
