do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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