That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
