She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize