Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
