walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize