Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
