She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
