I can tuck mytits in my pants
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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