So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize