That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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