I wish I could punch you in the face.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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