If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
