I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
And the cops told us we were all naked.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
