Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
