please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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