It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
