I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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