I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
