You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
