The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize