Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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