i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
