Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize