she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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