Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
