this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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