i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Help me help you realize you are a moron
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