Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
