I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Barsexuality is the new black.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
