Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
