please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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