I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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