i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
