Little spoons don't ask big questions
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
