Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
