...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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