i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Drunk is not a location!
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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