so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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