Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
