just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
After tacos, we're chasing women.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I deserve this hangover.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
