You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
