If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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